The last few weeks have been a whirlwind of activity for me personally, with plenty of ups and downs. The saga continues this week. Through all of this, I’ve struggled to put together a post each time I’ve sat down at my desk and looked at my computer; and this feeling has continued up until now. I don’t know what to do about it.
I find it incredibly ironic that, given my increased motivation following the author publication seminar a few weeks back, that I haven’t been frothing at the mouth and churning out more words than a packaging plant does meat (*ba-dum*). But my reading hasn’t suffered. In fact, it’s been going beautifully and I’ll be updating that on Friday, pinky promise.
So what’s been my issue? Maybe the fact that I feel guilty that I can’t always turn on the creative process like I want to at any time. That’s still something that I fight internally every now and then. On this quest for becoming published while balancing very real responsibilities, I have learned a lot about myself. But the biggest lesson is just how closely your emotional state can be tied to outputting your best work.
When I initially thought of that, I saw it as an excuse. Our favorite athletes, artists, musicians, and writers who have reached the upper echelons of their respective crafts probably could all speak on days where they were sick, down in the dumps, or just plain out-of-it and didn’t have the normal ‘spark’ they typically use to fuel their process. But guess what? They still practiced their craft. Through good times and bad, they still wanted to hone it and that type of dedication put them over the metaphorical edge of creative stifling.
So why do I still believe that your emotional state is important? Because in your most quiet moments that you have by yourself, it’s that inner voice that will give you much needed counseling in pushing forward past your limitations OR be the roadblock that will force you to stumble and fall short of your goals; and the last few weeks, I’ve been listening more to that naysayer voice than the one who imparts positivity and perseverance. There’s no one else to blame but myself in this.
Point blank, our thoughts become actual concrete, physical objects that we can interact with and touch. I firmly believe in the power of positive affirmation. But even with those thoughts, it’s important to put action behind them. Lest we continue to simply recycle the same rhetoric in our minds that sounds good but gets us nowhere. Maybe even worse, we beat ourselves up internally on being unable to see the results that we want to see right now, even though there are plenty of positive benchmarks to see (something that I will write on next week).
In writing about not finding my words, it’s ironic that with a bit of prodding, I realize that they were never lost in the first place. As a great friend has always said to me, TRUST THE PROCESS. I’m a welcome traveler on this road to success and I plan on enjoying the journey.
Until next time.